I am told I need to stop viewing sex as a sacred act that can only be conducted after a two-hour massage amongst a bed of flower petals, with candles burning brightly in the background – because, let’s face it, after seven years the honeymoon is over and after a ten-hour day lifting stones, picking up our son from school and cooking dinner, my partner does not have the energy to spend three hours making me feel like its okay to have sex with him. And he shouldn’t have to, so I am learning. My acupuncturist points out that men need to ejaculate fairly regularly for their chi to stay in balance. My therapist says that my partner is initiating sex to feel closer to me and that, if I don’t start putting out, the human race will die, considering that reproduction is a pretty instrumental aspect of survival. So I am embarking on a journey to heal my wounded libido and to ensure that my partners’ needs are fulfilled.