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Self-judgment: are you your own best friend or your own worst enemy?

In Insight and Self Awareness by Rikka ZimmermanLeave a Comment

Tools from Rikka Zimmerman on breaking free of self-judgment and living a life of joy, happiness, and fulfilment.


If someone in your life treated you the way that you treat you…would you still be friends? Or would you have divorced this friend long ago for judging you?

Self-judgment is an unconscious, abusive behavioural program that is plaguing every race, culture, family, and society on this planet. It is limiting every aspect of your life right now, and the problem is you might not even know that you are doing it. You might be thinking, “What? What do you mean I’m judging myself and don’t know it?”

You don’t know it, because you believe your judgments are what is real. The belief in judgments creates a distorted experience of life that validates each judgment proving your own reality. You truly are the creator of your own life experience.

I’m here to show you that every judgment you have is not right, not real, not true and is actually an incorrect perception.

How do you know?

Yet, if you can’t even identify these judgments because they are what you believe and therefore experience is real, then how do you know if you’re in judgment? Look at the points below to uncover the hidden judgments that are limiting your life.

Your personal self judgment assessment, please answer yes or no to the following questions:

When you look into the mirror do you think:

  • I’m getting fat. if I could just eat better I could lose weight.
  • Look at these wrinkles. I need to do something to stop this ageing.
  • I’m lazy – if I could just exercise more maybe this cellulite would disappear.
  • I look tired; I need to cover up these bags under my eyes.
  • I’m not as pretty as I used to be. Who is going to love me like this?

These are all self-judgments of your body. They are not real.

In social situations do you ever think?

  • I don’t belong here. Why can’t I just fit in?
  • I feel uncomfortable. Why can’t I just relax and be myself?
  • Why does it feel like nobody really likes me?
  • I shouldn’t have said that! Next time I’ll think before I’ll speak.
  • I’ve got to get out of here; there’s too much negativity.

These are all judgments of you in regard to other people. They are not real.

In regard to money do you ever think?

  • No matter what I do, there’s never enough.
  • If I can just survive I’ll be okay.
  • What I need to do is work harder so I can get myself out of debt.
  • I don’t know how to make money easily.
  • I feel stupid and confused with money. Why can’t I make it work for me?

These are all judgments of you in regard to money. They are not real.

If you checked yes to having thought any or all of these limited beliefs, then you are engaging in the illusion of judgment, and judgment is limiting every part of your life! I like to say, judgment is not mandatory. You don’t have to judge you.

You have been trained to judge you by your family, your society, your culture, and we can retrain you out of the world of self-judgment and into the world of possibilities. Judgment is just a habit that we can break, so that you can be free to create any life you choose.

There are 12 layers of unconscious programming that we need to unlock in order to set you completely free from judgment. The first layer is:

“Judgment creates your experience; your experience doesn’t create your judgment.”

When you judge something as being negative, you then create an illusionary negative experience. Let’s say the wind is picking up in Sydney. One person judges that they love the wind, and they feel invigorated as it blows through their hair, and the other person judges that they hate the wind as it makes them feel disturbed and out of control.

Which judgement is correct? The positive judgment or negative judgment? Neither.

The wind is not positive or negative. The wind just is. The judgment creates the positive or negative experience within the judger’s mind. Which would you rather experience: invigorated or disturbed? You are the creator. It’s your choice.

Does the same thing happen when you judge yourself? Yes! If you judge yourself as being unworthy, you create an illusionary experience of feeling unworthy.

If you judge something in your past as being negative or bad, then when you think of it you have a negative or bad experience. The judgment is creating the experience. Ask yourself:

“What are you judging as bad, negative or wrong that is creating undesirable experiences in your life?”

Ready to break out of the matrix that is creating negative life experiences and keeping you from the joy, happiness and fulfillment that you deserve?

Tool for breaking the unconscious habit of self-judgment:

When you are about to go into judgment of you, your body, your life, your loved ones, or the world around you:

Step #1: Picture a stop sign

Step #2: Choose to think of something beautiful

Science tells us that the thoughts, feelings and emotions we choose regularly create neuro-pathways in our brain that get embedded deeper and deeper as habits as we age. For example, when we make the first choice to judge ourselves as wrong, it is as if we are forging a new trail through the forest. After years of choosing the same path it becomes a habit until it is the only reality that we think we can experience. Quitting judgment is a lot like quitting smoking; make the decision to stop by using this tool. As you choose to think something beautiful you are creating new neuro-pathways to awaken a loving, joyful life experience.

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