How you experience your life and your sense of empowerment highly depends on what point of view you take. Your ability to make choices, succeed, be healthy and happy is tied up with your personal perspective.
Most people are not born with a victim consciousness. They develop it by observing others and taking on their beliefs and opinions. When you buy into one person’s beliefs and opinions, you are also taking on the judgments and beliefs of thousands, possibly millions, of people who may accept the same type of illusion.
The problem is that once these opinions have been imprinted into your mind, they become subconscious and you keep operating from them. For instance, many people have been imprinted with the belief that there is not enough, and that when they get enough of anything – attention, health, clothes, money, things, love, books, intelligence, sex, fame, etc., then everything will work, life will be perfect and they will be happy.
So most people spend their whole lives in a vicious circle of not wanting what they have and chasing what they think they want. However, because, on a deep level they believe that they are not good enough and not worthy enough to get what they want, they keep putting all their energy into what they do not want, which is of course exactly what they create.
You can be caught up in this insane cycle forever and not even be aware of it. This is because the people around you are also likely to be caught up in the same cycle and have the same limited points of view, which they believe are true and for which they have ‘proof’. Thus it seems completely normal to always be wanting or waiting for something great to happen to make you happy.
Even if one is aware of all this, it is incredibly easy to forget, get caught up in someone else’s opinion and give your power away. I recently saw a client, Janet, who is usually very chirpy and aware. She came to see me, telling me how depressed and unhappy she was. I hadn’t seen her for a few months. So I asked her what happened.
Janet told me that she went to see a spiritual advisor, whom she respected highly. The spiritual advisor told her that she was depressed and that she was hiding unhappiness underneath her humour and seemingly cheerful attitude. Janet listened intently, bought into this story and began acting as if she were unhappy and telling everyone how depressed she was and that all her biggest fears were coming true, including her partner telling her that he no longer enjoyed spending time with her.
The more Janet told herself that she was depressed, the unhappier she became. She also began convincing herself that she was not connecting with her partner and that the job she used to love as a creative designer was no longer fulfilling her.
When I asked Janet to examine those beliefs and where they came from, she discovered that not one of them was hers. What happened was that she gave away her power to someone whom she thought was wiser and knew more than she did. After having that realisation, Janet stopped telling herself that she was miserable and began exploring and enjoying her life again, this time, with the awareness that she did not have to buy into what other people said, even if they appeared to have more authority or knowledge.
This is how easy it is to manifest discomfort, pain, limitation or disease. All you have to do is believe and validate what someone else has said, that may not actually be true for you.
It is also just as simple to come back to your own power. All you have to do is be willing to ask yourself a few simple questions:
1. Is this belief mine or has is come from someone else, and have I bought into it?
2. Is this belief, thought or judgment empowering or dis-empowering?
3. Would a self-empowered being believe this?
Rather then taking on other people’s, or your own, limiting points of view, you need to examine their validity and usefulness.
You can observe anything detrimental that you think or others try to impose on you as merely being an interesting way to perceive things. By relating to everything people say as ‘an interesting point of view’, without agreeing or disagreeing, you remain free. Rather then getting stuck on opinions and then getting into judgments, criticisms, victim-hood and limitation, you can remind yourself how interesting all those perceptions and points of views are. If you view life from that perspective, it becomes a lot easier to experience the whole spectrum of life rather then keep getting pulled into limitations.
Another way to self-empower is to stop allowing the mind to run you and tell you that if you just achieve this big promotion, get the car, the relationship or something else you will be happy. Instead, begin recognising that happiness is always here and always has been waiting for you to tune into it and notice it, the same way that you tune in and notice problems.
When you allow yourself to notice what is already wonderful, your body begins to relax and open up to more of that. It allows you to go deeper into the joy, just as when you focus on what you don’t like, it makes you tense up and experience more of what you don’t want.
Most people have heard about the power of intention. So what would happen if you kept placing your attention on the happiness which is there, not dependent on anything else or anyone else? You can begin to experience that by focusing on the tightness you feel, and then relaxing and focusing on the softening that happens inside. Even if you are experiencing fear or anxiety, rather then getting stuck on that, allow yourself to drop into it for a moment and then check what is underneath. Keep doing that until you realise that joy is hidden underneath all the stress and tension.
You can also ask yourself: Am I willing to experience this? Am I willing to release it? Am I willing to release it right now?
You always have choice, even when you believe that you have no choice. Your choice is to live from your own inner knowing and look for ease, or you can buy into other people’s beliefs of struggle and suffering and hardship. Anyway, it’s all an interesting point of view.
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