“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” Marianne Williamson
Fear and manifestation seem to go hand in hand.
For years I considered myself crap at ‘manifesting’. Nothing I ever visualised, hoped or wished for ever came to fruition. I created dream boards, wish lists, set goals, cut out pictures of my perfect car, partner, money – pasted them on my bathroom mirror, blue-tacked images on the fridge, carried them in my wallet, said affirmations, got clearing, coaching, read Shakti Gawain and all the other ‘manifestation made easy’ books, but when I looked out my window in the morning the bright red, shiny Porsche with attached super yacht was not parked in my driveway.
Over the years I learned to hate the word manifestation. I could sense there was something so powerful and wonderful within me, but just could not seem to activate it.
I grew to see my inability to manifest “the life of my dreams” as God’s way of showing me I was a loser.
In the ‘new age’, manifesting the partner/house/miraculous was a badge of honour that this little boy scout never seemed able to pull off.
I had a pretty good life and enjoyed myself, but the big dreams the ‘real’ things I wanted always eluded me.
“It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”
I remember the first time I heard about the “power of manifestation” I felt an inner doorway to heaven had been opened. I was on a residential seminar in Hawaii with 350 other hopefuls wishing to create the life of our dreams, all happy to part with $1,000s in the process. By the end of the 10-day course, people all around me had manifested new businesses, relationships, money, contacts and success.
I left with the cold comfort of the seminar leader’s words ringing in my ears: “it all happens in divine timing”. I knew what he really meant was, “you are a loser”.
I had flunked manifesting 101.
And I am so happy I did.
If I had achieved all my goals and ambitions I would have been an insufferably egotistical pain. The ‘dream’ life I was setting out to achieve was not my dream. I was desperate to be accepted and seen as someone who had made it – the dream of success that included the flash car, big beachside house, handbag wife, knowing all the right people, eating at all the right restaurants, international trips, and the list went on.
I watched many of my friends and colleagues go on to attain all these things while I seemed to be God’s forgotten manifestor. In the wee dark hours I would find myself endlessly ruminating over my bad luck and poor fortune.
I had a good life. A successful business. Great friends. Belonged to a wonderful community of people who loved and valued me. But in my own eyes I was a failure. I had failed to impress people the way I wanted to impress them.
“You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.”
Then I began to really question the dreams I was aiming for and why they weren’t coming into reality. Were they really my dreams? Did they resonate for me at a deep core level? What was the source of these dreams?
I began to see that what I really wanted was to satisfy my own vanity. I was trapped in a palace of mirrors. All I could see was myself, all I wanted to see was myself, but the me I saw looking back was distorted and bent out of shape.
I began to ask, What is my dream? What brings me alive? What are my unique gifts and talents? What is the life I want to live?
And in the quiet hours I waited for the answers to arise.
“There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.”
The central focus of my life ever since I was in my late teens had been a life of meditation, service and self enquiry. So I needed to really align with this now and reshape my life. And this is how Aware Business was formed. [Julian co-founded the Aware Business Community in Sydney in 2006 as a meeting place for like-minded business people who acknowledge their work has a spiritual purpose. Ed.]
The vision behind Aware is “to enlighten the world”. My great gift is to gather great hearts and minds together with the aim of uplifting and inspiring others. And my work is to connect people to their deepest gifts and create pathways for their successful fruition in the world.
Ever since I started to be true to my inner calling manifesting has taken on a shiny glow. I no longer see it as fearful. I know how it works and what I need to do to stay connected to the extraordinary flow of the universe.
“We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.”
I keep studying the principles underlying manifestation and always seek to improve my capacity and capability to enhance the lives of others.
I have moved out of the palace of mirrors.
Aware Business continues to flourish and grow, and we are now collaborating on some major international projects including the Conscious Business Conference, which will be a calling together of leading lights in the international business world who feel soul, love and care sit just as comfortably within the business lexicon as profit and return on investment.
In these past years I have come to see that we are all born with a unique gift – and we all make a promise to ourselves to bring this gift into the world.
William Wordsworth (my favourite poet) wrote, “Our birth is but a death and a forgetting, from God we come trailing clouds of glory”. Our job is to remember our divine source and to come good on our promise.
Never in the history of the world has it been more incumbent upon us to remember our promise and live our gift.
” We are all meant to shine, as children do.”
We have work to do, you and I, good work, honourable work. There is a plan we are all working towards, and we need you at your best to get the job done. You will need resources, people, money, contacts and a plan. Learning the simple skills of manifestation are essential to all of us who are here to make a difference.
“And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”
This calling is not for the fainthearted, but bear this in mind:
“As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
And when you next look in the mirror, may it be God you see looking back at you.
Julian Noel, visionary, entrepreneur and champion for innovation, spends his time exploring and developing conscious business practices. He spends his time working with individuals and companies ensuring they are connected to their deepest purpose and aligned to their inner blueprint for success.
He says, “I would rather be tending chooks and living in the silence and majesty of the Hokianga in my beloved Aotearoa”. However, destiny and his life’s work have him living and exploring the fabric of life in Sydney. He writes a monthly email for the Aware Business Community, which people find oddly comforting.
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