Raym’s client believes she is seeing him to resolve a physical challenge but he uncovers a much deeper, unrelated issue that affects everything.
Marjory is not what you might expect to see in an alternative crystal shop. In her conservative, twin set and pearls she looks like a zipped up tight version of a mature lady who has walked straight out of some dated period drama.
My assistant Bryony has briefed me: Marjory is desperate, seeking help in a realm that she might otherwise quietly dismiss as silly nonsense. As Bryony greets her, I observe Marjory, assessing the deeper reason for her visit to my practice – it is not what she thinks it is.
Marjory is not feeling comfortable in such an alien environment and I sense my assistant Bryony’s concealed contempt for someone who epitomises all she has opposed in her life. It is hard to believe that my free-spirited, dreadlocked, fairy-loving assistant is probably the same age as the straight-laced client she is ushering upstairs to my session room.
“Good luck with that one”, she breathes as she walks past me, rolling her eyes.
“She is an embodiment of the Goddess, who moves in mysterious ways.” My comment is quite serious but it totally cracks Bryony up. She doubles over stuffing a hanky in her mouth so that the client upstairs will not hear her raucous bird-like laugh. I leave her holding her stomach with tears streaming down her cheeks.
Upstairs I greet my client who is unbuttoning her cardigan.
“Do you need to examine my breasts?”
“No need. I am a shaman, not a doctor. My assistant has briefed me.”
“What about the crystals on my body?”
“Crystals can work through concrete. There is no need to disrobe, as long as you are comfortable.” Marjory looks relieved.
“You are concerned about the number of cysts your specialist has been finding in your breasts….?”
“Yes nobody can explain why there are so many. It’s a worry.”
“Our aim today is to find the cause, release it and then observe what happens after the session.” I know that once we find the cause and deal with it the cysts will disappear, but I am mindful of my promises.
“Is there anything else?”
Silence. I know there is an issue, but I need her permission to explore it.
“How are your relationships?” A pause.
“Well to be honest I find it hard to be close to anyone, even my husband and children.”
“Would you like to change that?”
“I always thought it is just the way I am. Is it possible to change?”
“With your permission we will look into it today, if there is time.”
Laying in my crystal mandala we start our shamanic journey together. We scan her body and notice a variety of energies in her breasts. I suggest she commands her body to show us what it is holding there.
Immediately we are overcome by the sharp smell of burning flesh as the young woman Marjory is, has the right breast removed by a hot copper knife. She stifles her screams knowing it is not appropriate to show weakness during her initiation as an Amazonian warrior.
In a perverse repetition of this trauma Marjory experiences being a beautiful Native American woman lying on the hard cold ground in a decimated and burning camp. Her family have been massacred and she is being mutilated by leery American bluecoats.
In another time we find ourselves in the fetid, close air of a dark workhouse in seventeenth century Britain. Marjory is a grubby undernourished young woman who has just given birth. She is hiding, cradling an illegitimate, suckling child which is torn from her breast and taken away.
This experience repeats itself with a mid-twentieth century variation, where Marjory re-lives being an Australian Aboriginal woman living peacefully with her extended family in humpies in the bush. She adores her little children and is breastfeeding when they are suddenly stolen by ghostly whitefellas. She is devastated.
Some incidents intertwine more than once in their similarities – anyone could see their interconnectedness. They cover a huge span of time and each experience is held in a different part of her breasts.
As we re-live each of these ten past lives I wish I had a room full of students to witness how we hold multiple traumas. Unresolved trauma can repeat itself lifetime after lifetime, until it is resolved. This is the body’s way of helping us, by bringing it to our attention. Unfortunately present-day society does not understand our bodies’ signs, as our ancestors did. Ignoring them can be fatal.
Each trauma has its own unique resolution and it takes the whole session to release them all. As we finish I find myself hurrying as I am keen to get to what I feel is the real reason for Marjory’s visit.
You wanted to look into your relationship challenges?
Oh yes, I had forgotten. Let’s do that.
Please repeat after me – I call on any being close to me: please join me now.
A woman appears dressed as an affluent Victorian lady. They embrace. They are both crying.
Sister! Where have you been? I have missed you so much. It has been a long time! Marjory sobs.
I have been here with you all the time. Remember we promised we would never leave each other?
Marjory looks perplexed. I intercede: What year is it?
1856. Who are you and why do you ask?
I am your sister’s friend. Do you realise you are dead?
Her response takes me completely by surprise.
Of course I do. I remember the day well. I keep my promises. I am staying here, looking after my sister.
How do you feel about the others in her life?
I am all she needs. I love her. She knows that.
Marjory, please allow me to help your sister. She is earthbound and confused. Can you see how her presence is affecting your present relationships?
Before she can respond Marjory’s sister interrupts.
How dare you sir! I am not confused! I am here by choice, keeping my promise.
Marjory, all you have to do is release her from her promise and I can help her go home to light and find peace.
Marjory’s response is bewildering, unexpected and a first for me.
No, we love each other. I want her to stay. They embrace.
I try my best to persuade Marjory that this will impair both her and her sister’s growth, but she will have none of it. Mindful of the implications for my own karma if I push too hard, I respect their free will and wrap up the session, which has run over time.
My assistant Bryony returns after escorting a still emotional client out into the fresh air.
“Breasts are looking good. No more challenges there…”
“Her next scan will be clear.” I manage a wan smile.
“Pity about the sister…”
“I really wanted to help them both – maybe another time.” I am doing my best to surrender to the perfection of their choices and not to sound too glum.
“Yes. Another lifetime.”
Bryony’s irony reveals a deep truth. Marjory has missed a great opportunity to dissolve a co-dependent relationship, be closer to her family, step into her power and truly be herself.
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