Stacks of coins

You’re making it all up anyway!

In Insight and Experience by LivingNowLeave a Comment

Is the life that you have now the lifestyle you would consciously choose? What if you made up a better, bigger, brighter picture? If you want it, here’s how to get it. Here are ten proven steps to have your dreams and goals come true.


What do you really think about this life you’ve created? Do you think about what you have in your life? Do you focus on what you have or are you constantly thinking about what you don’t have? Do you look at what other people seem to have and compare your conditions to their situation?

There is a passage in the Bible that says, “To s/he who has, more will be added. To s/he who has not, even what s/he has will be taken away.”

What you focus on expands. What you pay attention to you create more of. This is an example of a universal generalised principle in action. If you focus on what you don’t have (i.e. what you have not) even what you have will be taken away. Have you noticed it’s often poor people who get robbed? They lose the few treasures they have. Where is the fairness in that? Fairness has nothing to do with it! If what we put our attention on comes in to existence, then our focus on what we don’t have (comparing our selves unfavourably to others) will be equally successful at manifesting. The universe will always eventually respond to our thoughts and manifests what we believe.

Whatever we experience is a result of the quality of our focus. Physicists tell us that in the quantum field the tiny sub-atomic particles come in to existence only when we observe them. It is our focus that makes them exist. They blink on and off like lights in a dark room. They blink in to existence because of our attention. Taking our attention off the particles reduces them to just a probability. Without our attention they will not eventuate. That is the magic of creation. That is how what we focus on comes in to being.

It is our attitude that causes the events in our life to occur. When we wake up to this powerful ability to create we realise we have a choice. What are you creating? What are you choosing? Do your choices include the lifestyle of your dreams? All the health, wealth and time to be, do and have a sublime life? What is your attitude to what you have in your life? You are creating it. You are making it all up.

How liberating to realise we can and do create our lives. We can choose what we create. If we decide what we want and focus on these desires every day they cannot help but manifest in our lives.

We all have dreams and goals. Some of them are simply ‘wishes’, like winning the lottery or sailing to Fiji, but we also have dreams that are vital to our futures and the wellbeing of our families, and yet many of us make little or no progress toward achieving our most important goals.

We wait and hope, but get no closer to our dreams. It doesn’t have to be that way. We all know people who soar from one project to another, achieving their goals and living the life they want. How do they do it?

If you want it, here’s how to get it. Here are ten proven steps to have your dreams come true.

1. Clarity of purpose

For a dream to become a goal, it must be specific. While it’s fun to daydream about being rich, it takes courage and hard choices to decide exactly how much money you want and how you are going to earn it. Being ‘slim’ is an image; losing 5 kilos by your birthday is a goal. In life, we probably can’t have it all. You can lose 5 kilos or you can have the cake and ice cream. It’s your choice. Be clear.

2. Commitment

There’s a story from ancient China about a general who landed his troops on the beach, then burned his ships. He wanted each soldier to know there was no turning back, no retreat, no alternative to victory. Once your goal is clear, emotionally commit to achieving it. There are no alternatives.

3. Talk about it

This is called ‘accountability’. Once you’ve defined your goal and committed yourself to achieve it, discover the people in your life who want you to succeed and start talking about your goals! Take time to consider which of your friends really do want you to succeed. Not all will. That’s fine. Don’t frighten them with new ideas and don’t try to convert them to the new you. Let them see your changes, results and confidence and they may want to emulate you. If you want to lose weight, don’t blame your friends for buying cake if they don’t know and understand your goal. Talking about your goals makes them emotionally real and powerful. It allows people to help you reach your goal and support you along the way. Some people may also criticise you or undermine you. You would not choose to share your dream with just anybody. There are some people who are not able to support you because that is not part of who they are. Choose your company wisely and stay firmly focussed on your goal.

4. Write it down

This is basic, and one of the oldest, simplest and most powerful techniques for achieving any goal. Write it down. Describe in detail precisely what you want, how you will earn it, when you will have it, and the benefits you’ll receive from achieving your goal. Write the details. Describe the life and lifestyle your successes will give you and your family. Write the colours, the shapes and the dates.

5. Write it every day

Every morning, use a card or corner of your day planner to record a short description of your goal where you will see it all day long. Don’t carry the same card day after day. If your goal is worth anything, it’s worth one minute of your time to write a simple sentence describing your dream and focussing on your priorities. Do this every morning and read it again at night.

6. Have a plan

Create a map for getting there. And put dates on it. A goal to retire at age 40 has no meaning without a savings and investment strategy. A goal to create your own business is just a fantasy unless you make a detailed plan to attract investors, find a location, hire staff and sell your goods and services. The beauty of a plan is that it allows you to track your progress. A plan keeps you on the path and gives you strategies for achieving the goal. The plan can be smaller goals along the way to the main goal.

7. Take action every day

Confucius said, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”. Any goal that is worthy of you is worth a few minutes of your time and some of your energy every single day. To one day write a novel, write a page today. To start your own business, read a business magazine today. To create a more loving family, give someone a hug today. To be salesperson of the year, make a call right now.

8. Use constant affirmations

One of my acquaintances is a professional golfer. From the moment his ball lands on the green until he sinks the putt, he repeats over and over, “I am making this putt!” He repeats that phrase as many as 200 times before every putt! Do you think he would be more, or less, successful if he spent those moments thinking, “I just hope I don’t miss it”? Tell yourself what you want to hear.

9. Review, and recommit often

Never be afraid to review your goals, evaluate whether you are still committed to them, and re-commit to achieving them. If your values or your choices have changed, change your goals accordingly, and be honest with yourself about it. If your goal still fits, run to it with all your heart!

10. Celebrate each milestone

Never wait to have a party. Each deposit in your savings account deserves a gold star on the calendar! And a hug from your partner. Each day without a cigarette deserves a smile and acknowledgment from yourself! Every step towards your goal should be documented and celebrated! When you get discouraged or have doubts, your record of past successes will quickly get you back on track. Not sure about this? Ask any marathon runner whether they count each kilometre on their run to the finish line. Celebrate each and every milepost on your way to victory.


Millionaire Mary King leads a two-day ‘Rich is Better – Wealth for Women’ workshops offering a greater sense of personal freedom for any woman who wants to learn to be wealthy. 

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